gen x vs. gen y: ding!

Excerpted from USA Today:

Matt Berkley, 24, a writer at St. Louis Small Business Monthly, says many of his generation have traveled and had many enriching experiences, so they may clash with older generations they see as competition or not as skilled. “We’re surprised we have to work for our money. We want the corner office right away,” he says. “It seems like our parents just groomed us. Anything is possible. We had karate class, soccer practice, everything. But they deprived us of social skills. They don’t treat older employees as well as they should.”

(as a gen xer this has pretty much ben my experience with gen yers, as well as for the many other clients i have questioned.)

And they believe in their own self worth and value enough that they’re not shy about trying to change the companies they work for. That compares somewhat with Gen X, a generation born from the mid-1960s to the late-1970s, known for its independent thinking, addiction to change and emphasis on family.

“They’re like Generation X on steroids,” Tulgan says. “They walk in with high expectations for themselves, their employer, their boss. If you thought you saw a clash when Generation X came into the workplace, that was the fake punch. The haymaker is coming now.”

(this statement really pisses me off, but is also something else i have experienced with gen yers… we open the door and then they hog all the credit! apparently, these people never learned there’s no I in team.)

Conflict can also flare up over management style. Unlike previous generations who’ve in large part grown accustomed to the annual review, Gen Yers have grown up getting constant feedback and recognition from teachers, parents and coaches and can resent it or feel lost if communication from bosses isn’t more regular.

(cmon… omg, cn we tlk? gal… lol! st&d… k, thx.)

excerpted from the wall street journal:

America’s praise fixation has economic, labor and social ramifications. Adults who were overpraised as children are apt to be narcissistic at work and in personal relationships, says Jean Twenge, a psychology professor at San Diego State University. Narcissists aren’t good at basking in other people’s glory, which makes for problematic marriages and work relationships, she says.

(halle-fucking-lujah! oh, the irony of those who can’t be happy for someone else demanding they themselves be praised for wiping their asses!)

But many young married people today, who grew up being told regularly that they were special, can end up distrusting compliments from their spouses. Judy Neary, a relationship therapist in Alexandria, Va., says it’s common for her clients to say things like: “I tell her she’s beautiful all the time, and she doesn’t believe it.” Ms. Neary suspects: “There’s a lot of insecurity, with people wondering, ‘Is it really true?’”

(does the word “sincerity” mean anything?)

Bob Nelson, billed as “the Guru of Thank You,” counsels 80 to 100 companies a year on praise issues. He has done presentations for managers of companies such as Walt Disney Co. and Hallmark Cards Inc., explaining how different generations have different expectations. As he sees it, those over age 60 tend to like formal awards, presented publicly. But they’re more laid back about needing praise, and more apt to say: “Yes, I get recognition every week. It’s called a paycheck.” Baby boomers, Mr. Nelson finds, often prefer being praised with more self-indulgent treats such as free massages for women and high-tech gadgets for men.

Workers under 40, he says, require far more stroking. They often like “trendy, name-brand merchandise” as rewards, but they also want near-constant feedback. “It’s not enough to give praise only when they’re exceptional, because for years they’ve been getting praise just for showing up,” he says.

Mr. Nelson advises bosses: If a young worker has been chronically late for work and then starts arriving on time, commend him. “You need to recognize improvement. That might seem silly to older generations, but today, you have to do these things to get the performances you want,” he says. Casey Priest, marketing vice president for Container Store, agrees. “When you set an expectation and an employee starts to meet it, absolutely praise them for it,” she says.

(honestly, if you want to compete with these people you are forced to demand recognition for your efforts, even if your efforts outshine theirs, otherwise, you will never get any credit.)

Some young adults are consciously calibrating their dependence on praise. In New York, Web-developer Mia Eaton, 32, admits that she loves being complimented. But she feels like she’s living on the border between a twentysomething generation that requires overpraise and a thirtysomething generation that is less addicted to it. She recalls the pre-Paris Hilton, pre-reality-TV era, when people were famous — and applauded — for their achievements, she says. When she tries to explain this to younger colleagues, “they don’t get it. I feel like I’m hurting their feelings because they don’t understand the difference.”

(crocodile tears)

excerpted from my life:

the fact that my parents were 42 when i was born means that i sort of straddle the line btwn gen x and baby boomers even though, technically, i was born during gen x. what this means to you, the layman, is, basically, i have very little sympathy for this bullshit.